premarital sex

Counselling tips on premarital sex and relationships

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Memorise: “Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge” (Heb 13:4)Read: Matthew 1:17-19
counsellingThe genealogy listed here included even those who were carried away in exile into Babylon and those born in the land of captivity. The fact that they were in captivity did not exempt them from this list.This means that all achievements and accomplishments for God’s Kingdom during captivity – wilderness period are noted by Heaven and remain relevant as far as God is concerned.

You should never be tired or discouraged during your trying moments. You will not lose your reward. Infact, service in the most difficult times attracts greater rewards for the believer.

Although not too much is said about Joseph in the Bible, this passage tells us one or two things about him. He was a morally upright and God fearing man. He was betrothed to Mary yet he never defiled their bed. Unfortunately, many would- be couples today have taken their consent to marry as an excuse to fornicate or engage in sex before marriage.

Hebrews 13:4 says, “Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge”. The moment you engage in premarital sex before or during courtship with the one you want to marry, it erodes honour in your marriage. You cannot eat your cake and have it! You cannot defile your bed and retain the honour God has prepared to envelope you and your spouse.

Do you know that if Joseph had forced his way into sleeping with Mary before their marriage, she would never have been the mother of Jesus? But because they kept their bed, God decided to honour them by asking His only begotten Son to come through that couple. Do you know that God still rewards couples who keep to God’s Word and ensure their bed is undefiled? You can be like Mary and Joseph.

Keep yourself pure. Your body is not for fornication. You abuse your body when you fornicate. Your body was never designed to be used for fornication. Stop abusing your body through illicit sex, lustful exploits in nudity and pornography! Stop engaging your mind in polluted thoughts! Keep your heart pure.

The choice you make today determines the events of tomorrow. Watch your choices.




By Pastor Enoch Adeboye

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How to avoid fornication and adultery

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1 Corinthian 7 vs. 2 But since sexual immorality is occurring, each man should have sexual relations with his own wife, and each woman with her own husband.

1.     Get married

2.     Be faithful to your spouse


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Sermon: I don’t want to go to hell

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1 Corinthian 9 vs. 9-10Or do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived:Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who have sex with men[a] 10 nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God.


To escape hell, avoid the following sins

1.     Fornication – Premarital sex

2.     Adultery – Extramarital sex

3.     Idolatry

4.     Homosexuality

5.     Tattooing

6.     Stealing

7.     Greed

8.     Drunkenness

9.     Partying/clubbing

10.  Extortion


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Is premarital sex a sin?

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1 Corinthian 6 vs. 18Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body.


  1. Yes the Bible describes it as a sin against your body.
  2. This means your body will be affected with some evils, every time you commit fornication.
  3. These evil may include sickness, demonic possession, ill-favour, bad luck etc.



Babatope Babalobi



Masturbation, premarital sex..what the Bible says

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Memorise: “But whoso committeth adultery with a woman lacketh understanding: he that doeth it destroyeth his own soul” (Proverbs 6:32)

Read: Genesis 4:1-7

 Pastor E. Adeboye

“And Adam knew Eve his wife; and she conceived, and bare Cain, and said, I have gotten a man from the LORD” (Genesis 4:1).

Until Adam had intimate knowledge of Eve, there was no conception. Who you know determines what you will conceive. If you want to conceive good ideas, children and blessings, draw nearer to God.

 Mary was overshadowed by the Holy Spirit – she drew very close to Him and in the end, she conceived Jesus Christ. The fruit or product of your conception reveals the distance between you and God. Similarly, every seed you sow becomes a tree.

When Adam knew Eve intimately, a seed was planted in her, which germinated and became a tree. Each time you truly draw close to God in humility, worship, praise and adoration, a seed is planted in you.

If you have noticed, you will find that whenever you are in God’s presence, some winning thoughts, directives or answers to problems will drops into your spirit man. Those are seeds!

“For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption; but he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the Spirit reap life everlasting” (Galatians 6:8). This scripture introduces us to two major grounds on which to sow. You can either sow on the grounds of the Holy Spirit or that of the flesh. Any seed sown on fleshy grounds yields an evil harvest.

For instance, if you give to support the church projects so that men can recognize your generous donation, you would have lost your heavenly reward. It is only when you sow good seeds on the soil of the Holy Spirit that you are guaranteed a good harvest. What kind of seeds have you been sowing? On what grounds do you regularly sow?

Be careful where you sow. You will reap from where you have sown. This produces sorrow in the life of an adulterer. Every man has seeds in him, but you cannot tell what each seed will become, except God reveals it to you. Sex with someone other than one’s spouse could make you sow your most precious seed or gift – your Abel, on a wrong or evil soil.

Many have sown the seeds that should become presidents, world class industrialists and their financial messiahs into a wrong soil – a prostitute or another man’s wife, and in the process lost both the seed and the harvest. Hence

Proverbs 6:32-33 warns that an adulterer lacks understanding because he is sowing seeds that should bring blessings to his family into a wrong soil. This is why some people are beyond redemption. Some can no more be drawn up from poverty, ignominy and reproach as the seed sent by God to do this has been lost. Have you been fornicating or masturbating? Immediately repent, turn a new leaf and ask God for mercy so that you are not beyond redemption.


Abraham sowed Isaac on a good soil and that seed is still blessing billions today. He also sowed Ishmael on the soil of the flesh and that seed is still causing trouble today.

Premarital sex is a sin, adultery is wickedness

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GENESIS 39:9  There is none greater in this house than I; neither hath he kept back  any thing from me but thee, because thou art his wife: how then can I do this  great wickedness, and sin against God?

Opening prayer:- Lord help me to see myself from the mirror of your word and to receive grace to put every truth into practice in Jesus name .

Sex is becoming one of the popular subjects today. Great songs are composed about it, and you see it in almost every movie that you watch. Sex appeal is used fir advertisement of toothpaste, drinks fast cars, dress, soap etc. As young people under pressure from friends and peers, teachers and other adults to go into sex. Sex is ordained by God and meant to serve is good purpose.

When practiced within a marriage relationship, it helps married people to be closer and to have children. However, when two unmarried people engage in sex, it is sin against God and has serious and disastrous consequences.

 Read Genesis 39:9 and see how sex outside marriage is described – it is wickedness and sin against God. God is serious about what you do with your body. Never give in to sexual sin. Run away from it. You will be happy at the end.

Thought:- think about the kind of movie you watch or what you browse in the internet; does it create a desire in you to try sex? If you must maintain your purity what must you do?

Question for the week

  • 1. Why should sex be practice only in marriage
  • 2. What is prostitution and what are some of the deadliest consequences?

Sex as a trap: sin of premarital and extra marital sex

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2 Samuel 11:2-17:One evening David got up from his bed and walked around on the roof of the palace. From the roof he saw a woman bathing. The woman was very beautiful, and David sent someone to find out about her. The man said, “Isn’t this Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam and the wife of Uriah the Hittite?” Then David sent messengers to get her. She came to him, and he slept with her. (She had purified herself from her uncleanness.) ThenA she went back home. The woman conceived and sent word to David, saying, “I am pregnant.”

So David sent this word to Joab: “Send me Uriah the Hittite.” And Joab sent him to David. When Uriah came to him, David asked him how Joab was, how the soldiers were and how the war was going. Then David said to Uriah, “Go down to your house and wash your feet.”

So Uriah left the palace, and a gift from the king was sent after him.9But Uriah slept at the entrance to the palace with all his master’s servants and did not go down to his house. When David was told, “Uriah did not go home,” he asked him, “Haven’t you just come from a distance? Why didn’t you go home?”

Uriah said to David, “The ark and Israel and Judah are staying in tents, and my master Joab and my lord’s men are camped in the open fields. How could I go to my house to eat and drink and lie with my wife? As surely as you live, I will not do such a thing!”

Then David said to him, “Stay here one more day, and tomorrow I will send you back.” So Uriah remained in Jerusalem that day and the next. At David’s invitation, he ate and drank with him, and David made him drunk. But in the evening Uriah went out to sleep on his mat among his master’s servants; he did not go home.

In the morning David wrote a letter to Joab and sent it with Uriah. In it he wrote, “Put Uriah in the front line where the fighting is fiercest. Then withdraw from him so he will be struck down and die.” while Joab had the city under siege, he put Uriah at a place where he knew the strongest defenders were. When the men of the city came out and fought against Joab, some of the men in David’s army fell; moreover, Uriah the Hittite died.

2 Samuel 12:7-12: Then Nathan said to David, “You are the man! This is what the LORD, the God of Israel, says: ‘I anointed you king over Israel, and I delivered you from the hand of Saul. I gave your master’s house to you, and your master’s wives into your arms. I gave you the house of Israel and Judah. And if all this had been too little, I would have given you even more.

Why did you despise the word of the LORD by doing what is evil in his eyes? You struck down Uriah the Hittite with the sword and took his wife to be your own. You killed him with the sword of the Ammonites. Now, therefore, the sword will never depart from your house, because you despised me and took the wife of Uriah the Hittite to be your own.’

“This is what the LORD says: ‘Out of your own household I am going to bring calamity upon you. Before your very eyes I will take your wives and give them to one who is close to you, and he will lie with your wives in broad daylight. You did it in secret, but I will do this thing in broad daylight before all Israel

There was an occurrence on the second night of my arrival in the Hotel in 2005 when I travellled to Niger Republic to atend a conference. a Sex worker approached me, and tried persuading me into Commercial sex. She is likely in her early twenties, very friendly and unashamedly marketing her services.

As she engaged me in a conversation on what she had to offer, the Holy Spirit counseled me to offer her Salvation by accepting Jesus Christ as her Lord. I preached to her with the aid of an Interpreter who understands her native Hausa language and to the glory of GOD, I succeeded in leading her to Christ on the spot. And she pledged to stop engaging in prostitution from that moment, blaming hunger for her engagement in sex work.

When I returned to my Hotel room, the Holy Spirit ministered to me concerning the incident, saying what I have just exercised is my freewill, which is a power inherent in all men to chose between good and evil.

The Spirit told me that temptations abound in life, but it is up to Christians to flee room it. Like some of the lodgers in the Hotel, I could have patronized one of the several Sex workers mingling around, and regard this as an inconsequential event, just having some fun or at worst ‘a little sin’ As I was in hotel, my wife was not around, and she would not have known if I had committed adultery with a Sex Worker.

I could have fallen to the temptation and still returned back to Nigeria my Home country, and join other members of the Church in shouting Praise the Lord during the next service- the Pastor would not have known that I slept with a prostitute.

I could have fallen to the temptation of committing adultery thinking nobody would known. I could have said let me enjoy myself for this night with this delectable lady, I could even had decided to use Condom, in order to protect myself against any Sexually Transmitted Disease. ‘A little sin’ I could have committed, thinking nobody would have known, but God told me the Holy Spirit was watching, and recording the incident.

The Hoy Spirit explained to me that King David was in a similar circumstances when he committed a little sin with Bathesheba, the daughter of Eliam as contained in the passage above. David had gone to relax in the rooftop of his house, and saw a beautiful woman bathing naked, and the spirit of lust influenced him.

He subsequently invited her into his house and committed adultery with her. The woman conceived, and David devised a way of passing on the pregnancy to the Urriah, the Htite who was the husband of Bathsheba.; for it would be a public disgrace if it was known that the King took the wife of a common man.

King David sent for Uriah from the war front, hoping that he would lie with his wife. But the man was more honourable that David, and refused to lay sleep in his house while his colleagues were in the war front. King David then devised another strategy, and according to his instruction, Urriah died in battle through a conspiracy.

So, David eventually committed murder because of a little sin. Of course, when he conceived the idea of committing adultery with Bathsheba, he never would have thought he would end up with murder of her husband. A little enjoyment, a little sin, was all he bargained for.

We have to study these passages very carefully to realize the repercussions of the little sin King David committed. The first lesson from the passage is that God is not partial.

Remember that it is the same David that God said David is a man after His heart. Throughout the Bible, God never said thus of any other person. God anointed David, but when he sinned, He judged him. If you are an Archbishop or the Pope, if you commit a sin, God will bring you into judgment. He will not cover you. God judged David, a man after his heart, who are you not to be judged.

The next lesson is that we must not be an accomplice of sin. David saw a beautiful woman naked; naturally most men will be tempted. If you study the passage carefully, you will realize that Bathsheba had a plot. She know her house was near the King’s palace, and in full view of the King. Why was she bathing naked in full view of the King? Seems to me that she had a preconceived plan to become the King’s wife. The lesson here is that as a Christian, you should be careful not to become an accomplice of sin.

How do you become an accomplice of sin? Do not lure people into sin by your acts. For instance, if you dress like a harlot, you are tempting somebody to commit a sin. So, Sisters, do not behave like Bathsheba, who stood in the full view of the King’s Palace and bathed.

Bathsheba possibly tempted King David into Sin. Moreover, there is no evidence that she was cautious when the King sent for her. Or that when David made sexual moves towards Bathsheba inside the palace she resisted. The Holy Spirit was there and if she had ran out, if would have been recorded.

The Bible says, flee from sexually immorality, it did not say observe or examine sexually immorality. When the wife of Pothiphar wanted to lure Joseph into sex, Joseph ran away leaving his clothers behind. Likewise when Amnon wanted to sleep with his half sister Tamar, she resisted it and cried after she was raped. Bathsheba did not struggled with or resisted David. So she might have been a willing accomplice of sin.

The third lesson is that when you are committing evil and you think it is just a little sin, your conspirators in the sinful act may have another agenda that may magnify the little sin beyond your expectations. King David just wanted to have some fun, but Bathsheba wanted to have a Baby for the King.

Because no sooner after her sexual encounter with David, that she came back and gleefully announced that she is pregnant! David never bargained for this, and had to devised a greater sin to cover up the little sin.

This brings us to the fourth lesson, that when you are committing a little sin, you need a bigger sin to cover it up. King David committed adultery, and he falsely thought it would end there, but he had to commit murder in order to cover up adultery. So it is better not to commit a sin at all.

David became a murderer because of a little sin. Youths that are into fornication, and think all you are doing is having fun, by the time the fun turns into unwanted pregnancy, you have to commit the murder of abortion in order to cover up you ‘funny tracks’.

The fifth lesson is that you do not have to cut corners or commit a sin to earn a living. After I converted the sex worker into Christ by the grace of the Holy Spirit, I gave her about $3 as a gift. She was shocked saying that would have been her fee if I had gone to bed with her. I then told her that the fact that she was able to get such fund without committing adultery with me shows what God can do for her if she trusts in Him.

Poverty or Hunger is not an excuse for unrighteousness. Trust in God, and He will surely provide your needs. If you read II Samuel 12 verses 10-14, you will see that there are several other repercussions of the little sin David committed. The sixth lesson that there is a punishment for every sinful act here on earth, even if you have repented, and God has forgiven you.

The son of adultery died within seven days. If you commit a sin, the product of your sin is ungodly. If you steal money from the office, or cheat in your business, and use the proceeds to buy properties, the equipments will be malfunctioning and thieves may come and pack all you of them.

If you are fraudulent in you business or office, you purchase a sleek car with the proceeds, and give a beautiful testimony in the Church, you are just deceiving yourself. The Car will be prone to accidents, and you will be lucky if it does not eventually become your coffin.

Another lesson is that when you commit a Sin, it cuts you off from the Holy Sprit. When the Son of adultery became sick, David cried and prayed all night for healing, but God did not answer him, and the baby eventually died.

The eight lesson is that you will miss you divine purpose and plan if you are disobedience to God’s laws. God

said because you have done this “the sword shall never depart from thine house”. Long after David had forgotten the enjoyment of the little sin he had with the beautiful woman, the consequences did not abate. Absalaom rebelled against him, pursued him out of the palace into desert and the Davidic Kingdom was divided into two. Before his eyes.

The ninth lesson is that, you have placed a curse on yourself and house held for every sin you have committed. God says I am a Jealous God visiting the iniquity of the father upon the children unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate me (Exodus20:5). .Few years later after David committed a little sin; Amnon, his son raped his half sister- Tamar.

The tenth lesson is that for every sin you commit in secret will be eventually be exposed, When the time of punishment for your sin comes, you will be publicly judged. God said “I will raise up evil against thee out of thine own house, and I will take thy wives before thine eyes, and give them unto thy neighbour, and he shall lie with thy wives in the sight of this sun” (II Samuel 12:11)

Absalom, David’s son eventually fulfilled this prophecy, and he lined up David’s concubines and slept with all of them one by one, on top of his father’s house, in full view of all Israelites

So today, God is calling you into repentance. I want you to start thinking, what is that little or big sin I am committing secretly or publicly. As a child are you obeying your parent’s instruction? As a husband are you faithful to your wife? In your Business, can your clients trust you?

As a wife, are you faithful with your husband’s finances? As a Pastor are you evangelizing or it is only on Sundays that you come and warm the front rows in the Church? As a Christian are you preaching the gospel to all nations or you are just a Churchgoer?

David has been our case study, but you do not need to fall from the grace of God before you repent. Some of you may be committing a little sin today, also in the false hope and belief that there will be no repercussions or consequences.

It may not be adultery, but cheating, lying, disobedience to God’s will, or wickedness. Today, God is asking you to repent and not to go into that sin again. For every sinful activity, no matter how little has evil repercussions, even after God has forgiven you.

Do you wish to repent of your little sins today? Do you want to be reconciled with God, through Jesus the Lord and Saviour? Then say this simple prayer:

Father, in the name of Jesus Christ. I acknowledge that I am a sinner and have fallen short of your glory. I genuinely repent from all my sins and pledge to go and sin no more. I accept your plan to reconcile mankind to you through Jesus Christ, who you sent in your name. I believe Jesus Christ is the Messiah, and died on the Cross to pay the penalty for my sins and redeem me. I accept Jesus as my Lord and Saviour. I pray that His blood washes my sins away. I invite the Holy Spirit to rule my Life. I am born again in Jesus name.

If you want more information on how you can build a new life with God, visit Save the World at or send an email to:

Premarital and Extra marital sex..would God forgive me?

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The heading to Psalm 51 below reads:“A Psalm of David. When the prophet Nathan came to after David committed adultery with Bathsheba.”Read the psalm slowly applying it to your own life and sin. How deep is David’s repentance. How he longs for God’s acceptance. This is the heart cry of a broken man. It is not a shallow flippant confession. It is not just saying ‘Sorry God’ as if his sin didn’t matter and God’s forgiveness was cheap.We need to feel the agony David felt as a sinner in the presence of God’sconsuming holiness. Only so will we experience the joy of God’s salvation.

What do we learn for ourselves and our Church? There is forgiveness with God for sex sins. For our sin and for the sin of others we may be tempted to look down on as ‘sinners’. Read the rest of this entry »