Bishop T.D. Jakes on secrets of succesful marriage


2 Samuel 21:8-11

            Women are nurturers by nature. They often struggles with submission, so the Holy Spirit challenges women to submit (Ephesians 5:22). Had Eve been submitted to her husband, she would have referred the serpent in the garden to him, her covering. As the church, the submitted bride of Christ, we are told to submit ourselves unto God, resist the devil and he will flee (see James 4:7). Submission brings strength and a submitted vessel gains power to resist. When the enemy meets with real resistance, he will flee. But we must understand that the battle is not ours; it belongs to the One who cover us!

 

            Within a woman the Holy Spirit establishes a nurturing spirit that will not allow her to push away her young but nurse them and to care for them. Doesn’t it make you angry to see how the enemy always wants to pervert good for evil? You see, Satan cannot create. He has to use what he is already created. He pervert corrupts, and even disrupts, but he cannot create. The wise woman learns his devices. Once you learn what he is trying to do, use your strength for positive purpose. Stop being seduced into using your abilities for what he’s trying to grow.

 

            Nurturing a problems not only strength from you, just as an unborn child can only get food from his mother. The enemy cannot live in a blood-washed, regenerated spirit. The enemy can only thrive in your mind if you let him live off your old memories and fears. He is a leech that depends upon your umbilical cord for survival. Cut that cord and watch your fears. Starve to death.

            Like Rizpah, who guarded the bodies of her dead sons until she had gotten the king’s attention and arranged a proper burial for them, you have to be careful not to hang around dead issues and keep company with things that ought to be put to death.

Rizpah was being faithful to her children, but some of you are hanging around issues that don’t belong to you. Recognize those tendencies to walk among the dead as the enemy seeking whom he may devour (see 1 peter 2:8) and don’t let him have you!

Source: T.D. Jakes

35 Comments to “Bishop T.D. Jakes on secrets of succesful marriage”

  1. Amazing

  2. Thank you for the artical on marriage, please pray for my wife and I finanical hardships and me being self centered in our marriage has caused problems within our relationship, how do u get the spark back. Monty and Leslye Faison

  3. bishop t.d. jakes,i praise god for what he has done with you………

  4. i would like to know more on how to be a great wife that respect her husband with out intimidating God

  5. Dear Pastor

    How does one trust their spouse again after being lied to repeatedly.
    Is it right for a husband to do everything that his parents tell him to, especially if it has
    to do with finances. My husband and i discuss and make decisions at home, but when he has
    visited home, whatever we have decided to do is changed to something else which his mother
    tells him. Aren’t we suppose to make our own decisions and have them end there. I’m frustrated because i see that i am not important in this marriage. I need prayer please.

    I love my husband very much and want, actually need God to restore our marriage.

    God Bless

  6. bishop what do i do when i realy followed the word of GOD that the battle is not mine but GODS but i remain hurt and heart broken whilst my enermy is is happy and prospering someone who destoryed my life

  7. Hi, I desperately need prayer. My husband & I are constantly fighting. For about 3 weeks he leaves the house at night & comes home the next morning, I think he has a girlfriend, I asked him about it, but he denies i. I love him very much and I want to work out whatever problems we have. I want to give my daughter a happy home. Please pray for my marriage.

  8. No question prayer is a CRITICAL tool for repairing any broken marriage– especially prayer for your spouse you’re so mad at. Also, adding some new ways of talking and making decisions together helps. http://www.po2.com has ideas for how to supplement your prayers with some skills!

  9. My husband has been having a relationship with a woman he grew up with. this relationship has been going on for 4 years. he reasonly moved out with this woman. I have been married for 32 years. i am in love with my husband, he states he loves me, but he does not want to be married anymore. I have tried and tried to forget him. I have praye and prayed. Pleae pray that God would touch my husband heart.

  10. This is great help for people in need. Sometimes people don’t know where to turn or who to talk to. It good there is a place that people can come together and share. God bless you.

  11. J Grif

    There is no marital problem that God cannot solve. You have been married for 32 years and you both still love each other, despite appearances.

    Keep fighting for your marriage. Go into fasting and prayer.Open your heart completely to the Lord, cry out to Him. Forgive your husband and ask the Lord to return the milk and honey to your relationship.
    What seems impossible to us, is always possible with God.
    “Prayer Rain” by Dr. D.K.Olukoya and “Point By Point 101 Prayers That Strengthen Marriages and Other Relationships” by Elisha Goodman has powerful prayers that you can use coupled with fasting.
    Don’t give up!!!!!!!
    God bless you and your marriage.

  12. helo my name is Ryan and i am not married yet,but i want to make the right decion before i get into a serious relationship.This gal that i am currently with is very nice and she have what i want in want in a women and not in a lady,but why am i so afraid to release evrything?
    I was hurt in the past and that is one of the reasons why i am so causes is that right or is the potential of the relationship reducing??

  13. I would like to obtain info on how to keep a mother in law out of our personal business and how to get my husband to realize that just because his mother asks he does not have to answer her EVERY question, especially if it is OUR personal business. How do you deal with the MAMMA’S BOYS.

  14. Pls help me to pray for my marriage,we constantly fight with my wife and there are a lot of disagreements.

    I battle to get permanent enployment,I don’t know why.

  15. Please help me to find a permanent job, and also my husband is an alcoholic we always fight about him taking alcohol but his parents keeps on telling me that it,s not easy for a person to quit alcohol I luv him very much but I also have doubt whether will be together till death do us apart I don,t want to loose him because of that, please pray for my marriage.

  16. Please help me quit smoking cigarette and taking alcohol, help me to love and to care for my family cause I love them very much but there is still misunderstanding between me and my wife.

  17. Me and my wife is saved, my wife accuses me of having an affair with a girl in my school,which is not true.she talked to the girl on the phone and the girl told her that she is in a relationship with someone.She told my wife that me and her husband are just friends.I was attacked and beaten up by our two sons that I helped raised from when they were 2 and 4 years old.Ialso had my life threatened,but did go to police to file A report.We are now going through A divorce,but I still keep in contact with my wife and she say”s she loves me and ask forgivenes and still wants to make our marriage work.Istill have love for her but I need spiritual advice in what to do. God bless TDjakes.

  18. How do i forgive my husband after he has cheated with protitutes in our own home?I have tried several times and finaly when i ‘m making progress to forgive him,i find an e-mail that he is writting to another prostitute so they can start exchanging pictures.I feel stuck,please help…

  19. We got married last year Nov.and we have been staying together for 6 years and have a beautifull 3yr old daugther.It has been 3wks since my husband has not been home.His friends tells me he is cheating on me and i also suspect it.He is aloso an alcoholic please help me restore my marraige.I alway ask God to take away the feelings I have for him if he is not mine and let him go.If he is mine i always ask God to fight for me i cannot do this alone.Please help me to find the way I love him and see future for both of us.Help me pray and find light…i’ve been fasting and praying making cry out,don’t know what else to do…

  20. just want to ancourage all the people who are having problams in thier marriges to say that God said he will never leave you nor forsake you and if he said so no body can ever cange that. god is a consuming fire he shall burn away all those troubles if only you ask in the name of JESUS. EVERYTHING IS POSSIBLE! He did not say that to flater anyone but he said it for a reason, go to him open heartedly and express everthind within you for he said he shall hear all our prayers and resound, if we trust and have faith in him what can stop him from blessing us? let us hold on to him and never let him go.

  21. Amanda
    My husband is addicted to porn, we dnt talk anymore, he comes home when at any time he feels like it. I dnt even remember the last time we have been intimate as husband and wife. A part of me wants to just leave. It always better when you know that you are alone cos there are no expectations. He has mood swings like a pregnant woman. He cnt even play with our 2yr old son at all. I am 30yrs and i dnt want to be stuck with someone who does not appreciate me as a woman.

  22. Pls, i also need prayers in my marriage. Av been married for about 7yrs now but recently i begin to notice non charlant attitude and pride in her ways generally. I still love her thats why am still talking and looking unto God for help, Please help me to find the way I love him and see future for both of us.Help me pray and find light…i’ve been fasting and praying making cry out,don’t know what else to do…

  23. Good and powerful words. Thanks.

  24. Me and my wife have been together for about 8yrs and married for 3 yrs and out of the blue she dropped the I’m not in love with you bomb on me she left me for some one who already has a girl friend with 4 kids no job.he just a drug dealer that’s who she left me for . But after all that I still won’t to be with my wife help tell me what to do

  25. Hi TD JAKES MAY GOD CONTINUE TO BLESS U PLEASE PRAY FOR ME AND MY HUSBAND AND MY YOUNG SON AT THE MOMENT MY MARRIAGE IS IN HELL, I PRAY BUT NOTHING IS HAPPENING. MY HUSBAND AND MYSELF IS SEPERATING AS FOR THE LAST 4YEARS OF MY MARRIAGE IT HAS BEEN UPS AND DOWN ABOUT WOMEN. I FOUND OUT THAT MY HUSBAND WAS IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH A WOMAN AND HAVE HER NAME TATOOTED ON HIS CHEST THIS HAS MADE ME HEART BROKEN. I WORRY FOR MY SON AS HE LOVE HIS DAD VERY MUCH AND CANNOT BE WITHOUT HIM, I WORRY HOW WILL THIS AFFECT HIS SCHOOL AND LIFE. PLESSSSSSSSSSE I NEEDDESPERATE PRAYS PLEASE PRAY THAT GOD WILL TOUCH MY HUSBAND HEART AND MIND AND GET MY MARRIAGE BACK BY SHOWING GODS BLESSING IN MY MARRIAGE. I FEEL VERY ANGRY AS I NEVER GOT CHANCE TO HAVE A MARRIAGE, MY HUSBAND SHOWS ME THAT HE HATE ME AND I FEEL SO FRUSTRATED I SHOUT ALL THE TIME, PLEASE PRAY FOR ME THAT GOD WILL HELP ME TO HEAL AND TO KEEP MYSELF UNDER CONTROL AS I WANT PEACE OF MIND. I FEEL VERY CONFUSED AND DONOTKNOW WHAT TO DO. THE ONLY OPTION NOW IS TO GET A DIVORCE. EVERYONE MARRIAGE IS GREAT AND GOT A CHANCE TO BE HAPPY EXCEPT ME. DOES GOD SEE ME AS A BAD WOMAN HAS GOD TURN HIS BACK ON ME I PRAY EVERYDAY LISTERN TO MOSTELY ALL YOUR SERMONS TO GET ADVICE ESPECIALLY I LOVE THE ONE LET IT GO.
    PLEASE SHOW ME THE WAY TO BE A BETTER WOMAN AND MOTHER AND HOW TO PRAY EFFECTIVELY, CAUSE MY PRAYS ARE NOT REACHING GOD. I HAVE LOST EVERTHING AND I DONOT KNOW WHAT I BEEN DOING WRONG. EVERYTHING MY HUSBAND DONE HE IS NOT TAKING RESPONSIBILTY FOR IT, WHEN I CONFRONT HIM HE BECOMES AGRESSIVE ABOUT IT, WHY WHAT CAN I DO PLEASE SAY A STRONG PRAY FOR ME.

    PLEASE TD JAKES HELP ME.

    NATALIE

  26. continue
    TD JAKES WHAT DO U DO WITHA HUSBAND WHO IS A GROUND MAN BY AGE BUT ACTING LIKE PLAY BOY LIKE IN SCHOOL DAYS. I KNOW MY HUSBAND SINCE WE WENT TO BOTH SCHOOLS AND ALWAYS LOVED HIM. HE SAID HE FELTH TRAP IN THE MARRIAGE AND DONOT WANT TO WORK ON US JUST HE WANT TO LOOK AFTER MY SON. HE MOVED HIS CLOTHES TO ONE HOUSE AND THE OTHER CLOTHES IS STILL IN OUR HOME. HE IS WITH ME MOST OF THE TIME IN THE HOUSE STILL WANT TO SLEEP WITH ME. I FEEL THATS IS WRONG IF U DONOT WANT TO WORK ON YOUR MARRIAGE. I AM SOOOOOOOOOO CONFUSED PLEASEPRAY FOR THAT GOD CAN DIRECT ME ACCORDING TO HIS PURPOSED. MY HUSBAND IS VERY UNDERNEATH ALWAYS HIDING PLEASE HELP ME TO PRAY THAT CAN SHOW HIM THE RIGHT PART AND TOUCH HIS HEART.

  27. Hello and God bless you & your family. Bishop T. D. Jakes today was my first time on your site and i’m in need of help with my marriage. We’ve been married for seven years and my husband chooses the streets, his friends, mother and all other things over myself & his family. He drinks constantly and most of the time won’t come home. Also our son in the fifth grade has just recently been diagnosed with type 1 diabetes. Please pray for us because I am in desperate need.

  28. hi stephanie god is great keep praying make god your comforter he is the only one who can help you, listern to all td jakes sermons it will guide you to the right part god want to lead your steps and your husband you need to be strong. I know it is hard but god is great once you have faith and believe. Since my last posting on this site god has really showed me his part in my life and how to walk in his purpose making god the food of my daily living, make god the food of your daily living and no one else. I pray that god will heal your son and direct your husband steps he will speak to your husband and touch his heart and keep the devil away. Donot let the devil see you crying, they is a place you can go and cry cry in gods shoulders only. I pray that god touch yor husband heart and direct you to gods purpose for your life. read psalms listern more the word of god TD jakes really help me and i feel great in my life and have seen alot of changes in my future. I know it is hard but try not to concentrate on whats going on around you, make god the only things you think about pleasing god and let god do the rest. Pray to god about all your problems and leave all to god he will do the rest at the same time do your will for god. Your son will be healed and your husband will be back if god wants that in your life if not let them go forgive and let them go speak to god everyday. Listern to youlanda adams hold on and cece winnans no one could love me like jesus and jesus you are so beautiful and by donnie stand worship the lord put the music in your house and set your spirt free loose the devil from your house and life and son and husband donot speak to any friends they cannot help you only want to know your business tell god .

    god bless
    natalie

  29. i rushed into marriage knowing that i stand knowing god (religiously) and he stands knowing nothing of god(worldly). i realized it afterwards it was a dumb move, however i also know the power of god, and the miricals he has done for each and everyone of us. the point is i need prayer desperately he now knows god as he takes baby steps and as i try to do my best since i was raised out of church. As he transition from worldly to godly we fight and i mean we fight. we both love each other so much and we both know that we want this marriage more then ever. we are a blended family 5 kids. we recently tried an activity were we just throw everything out on the table so that god can break us for good so that he can be able to start to build up a strong foundation, and i will admitt as hard as it was we made it threw that. however the fighting dont stop. His comments, his attitude, his lack of maturaty, HIS HURTFUL WORDS TOWARDS ME!!! i have gave up so much family and friends because of the abusiveness i would get at one time which i thank god for that. It took my husband a good minutie to no not to hit me anymore we both ended up in jail because of him beating me up and me defendeding myself . however he stop that but leaves all the others. we talk time after time again we agree to it then next minute i know he is doing the same thing because he has pride. Now let me be honest because im a fair person i tell you the way it is so i can shame the devil. Im not a very easy person to deal with in life im very out spoken like he is im very stubborn like he is i also too lack some maturity, and yes it is fair to say im dealing with my self but in a mans body. the only difference is my wisdom, my knowledge on what i was taught and i learned, i guess what im saying i need a miracle to take place we waisted so much time on the bad that, we dont want our kids to see this so we are tring to change but how do we change and raise our kids to be fruitful when there father does it when ever its right for him. im tired of the sorries, im tired of the hurtful words, im tired because he sees us going without but still chooses to do nothing about work nor life its self. i want a man of god i wasnt called to change a man and teach him how to be a man i not built like a man im built to be me and i long to have that change man knowing that he will never go back to what he was to what i know deep down in my heart what he is going to become. I have to speak wisdom i have to be wise i speak and lay hands on my kids and say what their lifes are going to become and he does nothing just watch please help me pray for me family plz

  30. Oh, Pastor T.D.Jakes. I am so greatful for these passages from the Bible. I have been married for a little over a year and four months into my marriage I left my husband. I found out that the woman who he said he left alone to be with me became pregnant with his child. I have not spoken to him until now. We do have two children together (one deceased) and a three year old. We have been through what I would
    think as the normal relationship (minus the cheating, physical and venal abuse).

  31. When am down I like listen to my bishop jakes,he is pro samuel of our time.

  32. Hi please help me out Im married to a cheating man, he’s beein seeing my sister behind my back and again dating different women i feel so stupid wat do i do?

  33. Bishop t .d jakes a voice that speak to me the real me with his god given gift of wisdom that heals my soul

  34. Amazing issues here. I’m very happy to peer your article.
    Thank you a lot and I’m looking ahead to touch you. Will you please drop me a mail?

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